While this was not my first concert as a bobcat, (that title belongs to Pitbull & T-Pain at the Xfinity Center in early September), this was my first time paying a visit to New Haven’s iconic venue: Toad’s Place. The nearly 50-year-old concert venue and nightclub has hosted over 1,700 concerts from Radiohead to Trippie Redd. I had the opportunity to see Mother Mother perform there last Monday, Sept 30 with my friend, co-host, and photographer Regan.  

The night kicked off with Los Angeles based band Winnetka Bowling League, whose stage props included gumball machines, three static TVs, and a fourth TV playing the 2022 Sony Film “Morbius,” much to Regan and I’s amusement. “If you get bored, watch “Morbius” in the background,” said Matthew Koma, lead singer before he performed “No One’s Ever Kissed You,” the second track on the band’s debut album “Sha La La.” Koma was joined on stage by his brother Sam Beresford on keyboard and Kris Mazzarisi on drums, whom he both lovingly credited as Ryan Gosling. The trio’s quirky, nostalgic vibe captured the attention of everyone in the crowd, who were all nodding along despite the initial unfamiliarity. Despite only discovering their music days before the concert, their uniquely energetic sound won me over quickly. Midway through the set, Koma took the stage alone for an acoustic rendition of Chappell Roan’s “Casual,” much to our surprise and the crowd’s enjoyment. This performance reeled audience members further into their distinct sound. My personal favorite song from the set was “Breakfast for Dinner.” It’s an upbeat, heartfelt song dedicated to

his wife Hillary Duff, which details all the warm and fuzzy things he wishes to do with her when he “pictures [them] in forever.” 

After wrapping up the set with “Slow Dances,” there was a brief intermission as the stage crew set up for the main event. While the mics were tested and the light bars were arranged, the speakers kept the crowd singing with classics such as “Mr. Brightside” and “Good Luck, Babe!” The anticipation amongst the crowd was unmistakable, with every intermission song’s ending causing a chorus of air sucked through teeth. I found myself getting swept up in the excitement, bracing for the main event to begin. Regan had split off to head towards the photo pit while I kept our spot. Being alone gave me a chance to truly soak in the crowd’s energy and people watch those around me. Behind me, there’s a mother and daughter clinging onto each other to not get swept away by the rushing crowd. On both my sides, I can spot gaggles of teenagers with expressive makeup and oversized tour shirts chattering excitedly with their friends. As my eyes darted from person to person, I was in awe at the range of the audience. I couldn’t believe how one band could unify so many generations and people of all backgrounds into one community. After the pit and I finished singing “I Kissed a Girl” by Katy Perry, the club lights were cut out, and the light bars were turned on, coating the venue with a blue fog.  

One by one, members of Mother Mother took the stage to increasing cheers. Ali Siadat, the drummer, and Mike Young, the bassist, dressed casually in loose black tees and jeans, which placed Young’s im

pressive tattoo sleeves on display. Keyboardist and vocalist Jasmin Parkin donned a sparkly silver button down with matching shorts, while Molly Guldemond skipped into position in a fun cheetah print dress with black bows. Before the lead singer was on stage, the other members of the band heightened the crowd’s enthusiasm by drawing out the first chords of “Nobody Escapes.” Lastly, Ryan Guldemond took center stage, wearing a sleek leather jacket atop a button-down shirt dotted with wolf graphics, paired with grey jeans. Before I could finish cheering, Ryan had begun strutting across the stage and leaning into the crowd from both the barricade and on elevated boxes on each corner of the stage. His bandmates filled every space he left with dancing and more crowd work, keeping both the performers and audience in constant movement. I quickly realized they weren’t performing for the crowd, but with the crowd, inviting us to sing and dance along every chance they got. The best way to describe the first song, and the entire concert, is chaotically intimate, with the nonstop crowd interactions only drawing the audience further into the sense of community.  

This energy continued as the band progressed through their set, alternating between new and old songs to please everyone in the audience, seamlessly transitioning from “Hayloft II” to “The Matrix.” As an old fan, I was impressed with how much they sounded like the original tracks: Ryan, Jasmin, and Molly’s vocals were clear and confident, with their body movements reflecting their energy. They owned the stage with their poses and choreography, seemingly begging the crowd to record and photograph their every move. Their love of the camera and stage presence harked back to rock and indie stars of the past. A third of the way through the set, the energy slowed as Jasmin performed a beautiful cover of “Video Games” by Lana Del Rey, which took our breath away. Afterward, Ryan led the band in more new and old favorites, such as “Explode!,” “Back to Life,” and “Bit by Bit.”

After a guttural performance of “Body,” a song detailing one’s exhaustion with themself and the body they live in, Ryan reassures the crowd of their worth, saying “We’ve got to thank this body, it takes us this thing through life. If you have a tough time looking in the mirror accepting you, look past it and dig deep, there’s so much beauty inside of you, I swear to God.” This speech began what I felt was the most personal part of the show, where Ryan spoke about his own struggles and how his sister and bandmate Molly helps him through it. “Something that helps me when I’m broken is my sister Molly here, it’s cool having someone from your childhood in your band. I hope that y’all have a Molly in your life, and if you don’t, at least you have a Molly tonight,” said Ryan as he introduced Molly’s performance of “Sleep Awake,” the first song he ever wrote for her to sing. As Molly sang “Protecting you, protecting me,” she reached out to her brother, who reached back.  

This interconnectedness continued as “Sleep Awake” led into the acoustic portion of the set, where the band members all stood shoulder to shoulder, with both Ryan and Mike playing acoustic guitar. Despite the music calming down, the energy in the crowd was as contagious as ever. The acoustic section consisted of abridged versions of multiple songs, including fan favorites “Dirty Town,” “Ghosting,” and “Little Pistol.” After “Little Pistol,” Ryan acknowledges the history of Toad’s and how it’s an honor to perform on its stage. “The last few years have been cool. [It’s] been a couple of decades kicking this can down the road… some old songs we thought would go to sleep got rediscovered and resurrected, and in the process our career, and ourselves, were resurrected,” said Ryan, who’s appreciation for his fanbase was apparent.

The most memorable moment of the night was when a fan named Apollo passed up a handmade jean jacket, with every Mother Mother album cover painted on it, and a returning fan named Parker passed up a custom-made shirt, which Ryan wore around his neck for the rest of the show. This moment was especially impactful because of the interaction Ryan had with Parker. Ryan explained that at the last show Parker attended, they gave him ‘homework:’ to record a demo song for his band Skelly and the Tons, which he delivered on a burned CD. “We want to be on the other side of the barricade, cheering for you guys,” Ryan said as the crowd hollered in agreement. The show closed out with “Wrecking Ball,” where fans placed paper hearts over their cellphone flashlights to flood the crowd in a warm pink glow. All the band members beamed towards the crowd and reciprocated the hearts by making heart hands after the song.  

Following the crowds’ chants for “One more song!” and “Encore!” The band returned to perform “Grief Chapter” and “Burning Pile,” which is one of my personal favorites. As the band was met with a second round of applause, the band members all leaned into each other, saying “We did it!” As we walked out of the venue towards our Uber, I chatted with a fan who gushed about the performance. The last few songs of the concert stuck with me the most not because of the songs themselves, but because it solidified that not only does Mother Mother have a strong stage presence and voice, but they have an even stronger sense of community. The closeness of the crowd was something I had never experienced at a show before, and the unspoken shared understanding of the lyrics left me speechless. Talking with the fan outside of the venue felt like talking to an old friend, even though our only connection was through our love of the artist. I believe that Mother Mother’s dedicated, creative community is their biggest accomplishment and is something that should be treasured for years to come.